A Texan in Tibet - Nepali New Year!

"I can’t believe it’s been an entire year since I didn’t become a better person."
-Me

Happy new year! At least in Nepal, anyway. Yup, today is the start of the year 2082 on the Nepali calendar and the locals are celebrating. I'm wondering how they arrived at 2082 when the rest of the world is stuck in 2025. Are their days shorter? Did the rest of the world miss something? Are they just that much more enlightened than the rest of the planet? Perhaps they just want to get as far away from 2020 as possible. I considered that maybe it was because the Nepalis haven't wasted so many days falling back for fall like we do in the States, but if that were the culprit, Arizona and Hawaii would be celebrating the year 2082 also. Topics like this are one reason having A.D.D. has its benefits. My mind is already off to pursue other trivial matters.

Whatever their reason, it's a holiday today and no visa processing it taking place at the Chinese embassy. I suppose the Chinese locals working in the Kathmandu embassy get the day off too. The bottom line is that we will spend the days that we had planned to be in and around Kathmandu before our time in Tibet instead of after. While, this is somewhat annoying, it's not catastrophic as our actual riding time is not impacted. Think of it as one of those sliding square puzzle games. There's no more or no less space occupied at any given time, the positioning is just rearranged. But I digress.

The six riders in our crew are all here and we spent yesterday getting to know each other while touring temples and other monuments. Looking at the photos, one would think that each site is just another temple, but the reality is they all serve specific purposes and have unique differences once you get inside. For instance, one such site called Pashupatinath Temple has an outrageous barbeque every day and every night. I'll post details on that and the menu in an upcoming entry.

Our crew consists of three Aussies, one Sri Lanken, one Brit, and me, "the Texan". Everyone seems fun and easy-going and we can all throw and take punches knowing it's in jest. They were all here before I was, so I'm the new guy. Everyone said where they were from, to which I responded with my usual "I'm a Texan". Those who know me know how shy I can be [sic], so when I sensed the slightest degree of trepidation from the group after stating my residence, I made brief but sincere eye contact with each one and said, "okay, let's hear it". And, I heard it. It was a short, yet engaging conversation, sans angst or personal attacks. Of course the main topics were President Trump and the tariffs, and I had an incontrovertible response for each. In the end, one of the Aussies made a profound observation, stating that Trump is only doing what nearly every other world leader wishes they could do. He added that they can't because they are more concerned with their political survival than they are for the countries they lead. I told him that if I had a microphone, I'd hand it to him so he could drop it.

Last night, we met with our fixer and his guide who will lead the Nepali portions of the trip. The key take-away was that drivers here are batshit crazy and that we will all likely fear for our lives until we get out of the densely-populated areas of Kathmandu. Once we're out of town, it's the terrain that becomes batshit crazy and our focus will shift from avoiding aggressive drivers to avoiding potholes, washouts, mudslides, and livestock. The answer to the question you're probably asking is yes, this is fun to me, and I'm jonesing to hit the road...figuratively, not literally.

 

The briefing focus quickly shifted to China; getting into China, dealing with the Chinese military, and what we can and cannot do when and where. They described the strict border crossing process and offered stern warnings about contraband, photographing/videoing the inspection and interview process, and our behavior at the military checkpoints that are scattered between the Nepali border and Everest base camp. Contraband items include any Free Tibet materials, any maps of the area that list the territory as Tibet instead of China, weapons, ammunition, fireworks, and drones. They added that Chinese soldiers will x-ray our luggage and that we must hand over our unlocked phones so they can review them for prohibited images; even in the trash folders. Our approved escort will deal with the Chinese on our behalf and serve as our interpreter. We were warned that despite that Chinese officials will likely speak no English to us directly or in our presence, they are very fluent and every word we say to them and among ourselves will be monitored and recorded. The key take-away here is that these guys are serious and the Chinese border crossing formalities are no game. I guess I'll leave the whoopie cushion behind.

 

After our hosts departed, the six of us sat around our bar table swapping riding stories, mulling over the briefing details, and trying to calculate the bullshit factor for the cautioning we had just received. While most of us believe there was likely a degree exaggeration intended to get our attention, we also agreed that we weren't going to test it. From my perspective, Midnight Express was a great movie, but I don't want to experience it firsthand.

 

We plan to celebrate the new year by hiring a cab for the day and hitting more sites. While we anticipate the traffic getting to and from the sites to be even more insane than usual, we've all pretty much acclimated to it and no longer flinch and pinch our sphincters for the duration of the ride.