International Clitoris Awareness Week
There are some things even I can't make up. Nevertheless, I try to do my part to celebrate Clitoris Awareness LIFE and it appears the world is finally catching on. We'll start with a week and work up from there.
"Clitoraid is proud to announce its first annual International Clitoris Awareness Week, May 6 to May 12," said Nadine Gary, Clitoraid spokesperson, in a statement released today.
Clitoraid? I've heard of Kool-Aid and Gatorade. How the hell did I miss Clitoraid? Where can I get some? I wonder if I can make it in my Soda Stream.
More from Nadine Gary: "This year, we'll celebrate the sexual pleasure of all women, since all can benefit from more sexual appreciation." She said another Clitoraid mission is to raise public awareness about the clitoris. "It's been ignored, vilified, made taboo, and considered sinful and shameful for centuries because of patriarchal religious values," Gary said. "It's time to give this beautiful organ the attention it deserves. It's the only human organ with an exclusive sexual pleasure function!"
I like to believe I've done my part to appreciate the clitoris ever since I learned what a clitoris is (thanks Penthouse Letters). But, leave it to the church to vilify something like the clit. I suppose they think the penis is just fine the way it is. Oh, wait. There's the whole circumcision covenant thing from the Book of Genesis. But I digress.
Adopt a clitoris? Does one need a lawyer to do this? Gives a whole new meaning to LegalZoom.com! I see this as being like Lays Potato Chips; you can't eat just one. On second thought, I'd better just stay away or the Duggars would look like misopediacs compared to me.